The printer song

**“Out of Ink, Out of Luck”** The rain taps on the trailer roof, your paper tray hangs low, I sent my heart to print tonight, but you just blinked “No.” We used to make our copies, now you won’t pull one sheet through, There’s a half-printed goodbye here, and it’s fading just like you. I bought the finest cartridge down at Miller’s general store, You swore that it was empty, so I went and bought one more. Now the rent is on the counter, and your light is burning red, You keep saying that you’re jammed up—I keep wishing you’d have said. **Chorus** Oh, printer, why’d you leave me with these words I couldn’t send? You chewed up every letter where I begged her back again. There’s whiskey on the desktop, there’s a paper moon outside, And a little piece of her goodbye still stuck somewhere inside.

**“Out of Ink and Out of You”** The rain taps time on the windowsill, Your paper tray sits bare and still. I sent my heart in black and white, You blinked “offline” all through the night. I bought fresh ink down at the store, You chewed my letter up once more. Now half her name’s caught in your gears, The other half’s all coffee tears. Oh, printer, we’ve both seen better days, Got empty hearts and paper trays. She left me here, you won’t pull through— I’m out of ink and out of you.

"Paper Jam Blues" Verse 1 I bought you back in '19, you were shiny, you were new, You printed out my boarding pass the day I flew to Kalamazoo. Now you blink that orange light at me, and you never tell me why, You've got a full tray of paper, but you just let it sit and lie. Chorus Oh, printer, printer, why'd you do me wrong? I only need one page, but you've been warming up all day long. You say you're out of cyan, but I'm printing black and white, Lord, I'm fixing to unplug you, but I'll miss you every night. Verse 2 Last night I printed my divorce papers, you jammed on page three, Even the machine in the corner don't want to set me free. I'll walk you to the curb on Tuesday, in the rain, the way you'd want, And I'll still hear you grinding when the WiFi says you're gone.

**Verse 1** My printer jams the second that I need it most, It chews the page and coughs a sad little ghost, I bought it with a promise and a shiny blue light, Now it just stares at me each dark and lonely night. **Chorus** Oh, my printer, you were never my friend, Ink running dry, and the paper's at its end, I'll sit here by the tray and wait for one more try, Oh, my printer, you let every page run dry.

(Tempo: Slow, acoustic guitar with a mournful harmonica) (Verse 1) The moon is hanging low above the desk in the hall I’m staring at that blinking light against the bedroom wall I got a deadline looming and my coffee’s getting cold But this piece of plastic junk is acting mighty bold I poured the finest ink in, I cleared every single jam But it won't give me a straight answer, no matter who I am. (Chorus) Oh, it’s a low-ink heartache, a paper-feed blues Running out of cyan and nothing left to lose I’m begging for a page, just one simple sheet But it’s a cold, digital silence and a bitter defeat Yeah, my heart is breaking down, just like this machine The saddest printer driver that this world has ever seen. (Verse 2) It says "Error Code 4-0," but it won't say what it means Like a lover who walks out on all your wildest dreams I checked the connections and I toggled every switch But there ain't no amount of patience that can fix this glitch Now I’m sitting in the shadows, feeling hollow and blue Just me and a tray that says "Out of Paper"—and it’s true.

(Verse 1) It sits in the corner, cold and gray Just another broken toy at the end of the day. I fed it the paper, I pressed on the start, But it gave me a glare with its hollow stare. The light turned red like a warning sign, I wasted my dollars, I lost my time. (Chorus) Oh, why do you judge my spelling mistakes? With a little red eye and heartless slacks. You’re empty of ink but full of spite, Printing out errors in the middle of the night. Yeah, my relationship’s running dry, Just me and you, under a blinking eye. (Verse 2) I bought new cartridges, expensive and blue, Thinking maybe now we’d get through. But the cable is frayed and the rollers are stuck, Like love that has lost its original luck. Now it’s jammed in the back, stuck fast, Watching my dreams slowly pass.

**Verse 1** Last night the printer went dark, Its fan spun low, then fell apart. I watched the paper pile go still, And felt the weight of unfinished words. **Chorus** Oh, my printer, you stole my dreams, Now every page is blank and gray. I miss the whirr that once filled the room, And the click of ink on paper, sweet and warm. **Verse 2** I typed a letter, pressed send, But only static whispered back. The box sits empty, the ink runs dry, And I’m left with nothing but the sigh. **Chorus** Oh, my printer, you stole my dreams, Now every page is blank and gray. I miss the whirr that once filled the room, And the click of ink on paper, sweet and warm.

(Tempo: Slow, melancholic) (Instrumentation: A lonely acoustic guitar and a weeping pedal steel) (Verse 1) Late at night, the whiskey’s in my glass The morning brings a deadline I must meet I hit "Print," but seconds slowly pass And my old friend is staring in defeat I hear your rollers turn, then fade away A quiet click is all you have to give I’m begging you to work with me today ‘Cause without you, I don't know how I'll live. (Chorus) Oh, why you gotta leave me all alone? With a paper jam and lights a-flashing red I need black and white, but you just sigh and moan "Out of Cyan" is the only thing you've said Yeah, you’re offline now, and I am crying too Just a broken down inkjet that’s given up on you. (Verse 2) I spent my last ten dollars on your ink I cleared your tray and gently stroked your side But now you just make noises, makes a fella think You just don't care about the tears I’ve cried A blank page tumbles out into the tray Like all the dreams I’ve watched you chew and spit So I’ll just watch your amber signal play And mourn the page that I will never get. (Chorus) Oh, why you gotta leave me all alone? With a paper jam and lights a-flashing red I need black and white, but you just sigh and moan "Out of Cyan" is the only thing you've said Yeah, you’re offline now, and I am crying too Just a broken down inkjet that’s given up on you. (Outro) (Pedal steel swells and slowly fades) Yeah, I'm out of luck... and you're out of cyan... (One final, quiet guitar pluck)

(Tempo: Slow, mournful) (Instrumentation: A weeping steel guitar and a lonely acoustic strum) **Verse 1** It’s two in the morning, I’m nursing a beer, Got a job application and the deadline is near. I pressed on Ctrl+P, but you just blinked in red, With a grind and a groan like you’re wishing you’re dead. You sit on that desk, full of silence and spite, Leaving me stranded in the dim office light. **Chorus** 'Cause you're out of cyan, and the black's running dry, You got a paper jam, Lord, I just wanna cry. I fed you my dreams, but you chewed 'em right through, Oh, I'm so out of ink, and I'm so out of you. **Verse 2** I bought you new cartridges, spent my last dime, But you spit out an error code one more damn time. "PC Load Letter," oh, it cuts like a knife, You're the hardest old gadget I've loved in my life. Now my papers are wrinkled, my future is shot, And you’re just a heavy, high-tech piece of junk that I bought. *(Steel guitar fades out out into a low whirring sound)*

My printer and I had a good run It spat out pages like they were fun Then one Tuesday it just stopped taking orders And left me lost in the paper borders Now the ink is low and the heart is low too It says "paper jam" but I'm jammed with you And I swear that it's just a machine But it's the only one that's worked this clean since nine So paper when I load it Paper when I feed it Paper in this cold room Paper makes a believer out of me So I'll keep a spare routine And print a fake goodbye To the only thing in this house That still knows how to write fine Now it hums at night like it's dreaming of more Of a full cartridge and an open door I put my hand inside where the letters used to go And the only thing it prints is a handwritten note That says "paper when I load you Paper when I feed you Paper in this cold room Paper makes a believer out of me"

Here's one for you — "Paper Jam Blues" **Verse 1** She used to hum so sweet on my desk at night, Fed paper through like a dream. Now the red light blinks and my heart sinks, Not a single page comes clean. **Chorus** Oh printer, printer, why you treat me so mean? I gave you ink, I gave you love, I kept your tray clean. You jam at midnight when I'm tryin' to say goodbye, And you leave me standin' here with paper tears in my eyes. **Verse 2** I tried talking soft, I tried starting over, Unplugged you and prayed. But you just spit out my resume, Like you never wanted to stay. **Chorus** Oh printer, printer, why you treat me so mean? I gave you ink, I gave you love, I kept your tray clean. You jam at midnight when I'm tryin' to say goodbye, And you leave me standin' here with paper tears in my eyes.